Incase you didn’t know… Ityadi means etcetera in hindi.
Love. It’s such a powerful word. Literally! Just like war. Maybe that’s why they are often used together. Love can either make you powerful or steal you of all your power.
Have you observed a weighing balance? Well I have. As a child, when I’d walk into a store with my mother, I’d put my chin on the counter as they measured the food grains and other groceries on the weighing scale. A fat old man would usually be at the counter, counting his money; while a thin worker would be busy running around and fetching stuff dictated by my mother out of a list, and measuring it in front of us. He would put solid black metal blocks of weights like 500g, 1kg etc on one side, and a bag on the other and fill it with the grains.
Only for a brief moment would I see the scales in equilibrium, and then they would go back to being in opposite north-south directions.
People in love, are just like the scales. A couple resemble the balance in how they are almost always leaning towards opposing sides. This according to me, symbolises the almost ‘never equal’ distribution of power in all relationships.
The proof of it is all around you. Just think of any couple that come to your mind or take your own example (if you were or are in a relation). Most often we see the man calling the shots, making decisions in both financial and personal space. The woman, who seems meek in comparison to her partner, may not have been so before she fell in love. But, to allow one side of the balance reach higher, the other side has to slide down.
This can be the other way around too, where women are on the powerful side. However, unlike women, who have to battle inequality outside the relationship as well, men compensate by feeling more assured outside the relationship (like at work or with friends) and thus are not much affected by the imbalance.
In a relationship, there is always someone who loves more and someone who loves less or expresses less. In my experience, the more you love & express, the lower you sink on that scale, allowing the lesser loving partner all the power to control, manipulate, and change you the way they want to.
The sad part of the power imbalance though is that the powerful person almost always attains a sense of entitlement and begins to ill treat the other, treating their significant other as a subservient rather than a partner.
The only way to avoid the death of such relationship is if the balance is constantly moving up and down more like a seesaw, where there is a healthy exchange of love and power.
“Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anaemic.” -Martin Luther King Jr.
What is your opinion about love and power? Let us know…