It was one of those days when I was bored at home.
Staying home is otherwise a bliss.. but then shit hits roof when after a few days you come to a realisation that you are surrounded by stuff you don’t even remember you had- those chocolate wrappers beside your bed you forgot to throw, those books- half read and waiting to be finished, those blankets on your bed that make it look like it had just been used as a ring for WWE, the bean bag that now holds all the partially worn clothes. I know I have to clean it but I don’t. I instead wonder if my life is as chaotic and messy as my room.
So what do I do? I do not bother with the mess, and instead do what I am best at. Escape.
I pack my laptop, wear those classic blue jeans and a casual peach color tee that I’m most comfortable in and head out into the sun. I need to get things done. Being in-between jobs is like a board exam pressure situation. Study, prepare and hunt! Who says life gets easy when you adult *rolling my eyes*.
So I go to this serene little cafe near my place. It usually is devoid of any human forms sparing a single waiter and a cashier who are usually too self absorbed to bother me much. This is perhaps the main reason I visit this cafe often. But today, there was a couple sitting at a table in the corner. I walk in and notice their watchful eyes turn towards me as they stop midway through their conversation. I act indifferent and walk to my table with an air that is reserved only to the regular customers and get comfortable. I order iced tea and open my laptop. There are a lot of things pending on my to-do-list, and soon the couple go AWOL from my brain.
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Until I hear…
“I can’t believe you’re still doing this!” the girl’s voice is loud. Louder than their usual tone.
“It’s not a big deal”, he says, trying to shrug her off.
“It is a big deal for me. For us. How can you be so careless about yourself and our future?”
“Relax.. How many times should I explain to you that it is not bad. It’s in fact good.”
At this point my ears prick and completely glue themselves to the conversation. I’m curious. Is this a cheating scene? Scandalous! I am more interested now.
“Don’t give me that bullshit. I have told you already that if you want our relationship to continue, you need to stop it”, there is a quiver in her voice as she speaks these words.
“No, I can’t. I’ll stop when I want to. Not when you ask me to.”
At this point I hear silent muffled tears from the girl.
“This proves how important I am in your life”.
“No, it doesn’t. You’re overreacting. It’s not a big fucking deal”.
“Forget it! I’m calling it off”. I hear the finality in her tone as she stands up.
I sense something swish by from her hand. Like she flung something on the ground. I want to turn around and see, but better sense prevails. I do not want to seem intrusive although I was obviously eavesdropping.
She walks past me to the door of the cafe, leaving the guy stranded. I wasn’t sure of the expression on his face and the curious writer in me decides to risk the embarrassment of getting caught intruding and quickly sneaks a peek at him. The look on his face is one of sheer agony, which is a surprise. I had expected a slight smugness or indifference. For a long time there was silence and then he rises and leaves too.
With the cafe empty, I look around uninhibitedly, and there, at a corner I see a joint that seems like it had been through a concrete mixer. That joint was the object that she had flung across in anger? Their conversation made less sense now than it had been with him cheating.
She had a problem with him being a stoner? With its obvious harmful effects as well as health benefits! I however do not think weed deserved a footage of this sort & to cause break up of a relationship.
It was absurd. It was an obvious lack of knowledge and a one sided perception of the world that could have led her take such an erratic decision.
I dwell over it for a while and then google the benefits of the plant to reassure myself that I was still on the same page with sanity. Thank God! I still am.
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Nah. Its totally understandable. Pot dulls your emotional response. Unless both parties in the relationship are stoners, scenes like this are inevitable. Pot makes you lazy, uninspired, unmotivated, and most of the time you dont care much about anything. Been there done that. Heard these exact same lines. It does boil down to which is more important.
I have my friends who use pot as a stimulant to help them think and understand the world better. And I have seen them become really successful at what they do. They use it rather than misuse.