misfit love, eternal love,

A Misfit in Love with Miss Misconception

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Chapter – 1:

Like every morning, he has just returned from his office and is right in-front of one of his roommate and so called friend’s lappy’; going through all previous messages sent by her on Facebook.

No doubt, his life has been like a pendulum sway and his destiny has made him rock n roll on the hard consequent drum beats and sufferings of this life.

But, as if he has seen the rising Sun again in her eyes.

As if he would run and catch the horizon to meet her across.

As if she could only quench his need, provided success has to come and kiss his feet. Deep down inside, somewhere he knows it for sure that it is only his love for her, which motivates him every morning to struggle, strive and reach till the epitome of success and also strengthens his every night to fight against all possible nightmares.

“A Girl from my Next Door”.

And yet again a silent heart,
Under a state of comatose till yesterday;
Has gotten alive to palpitate in vain,
Ooh..!!! It is so insane.
As in the end,
It would prove to be a waste;
Indeed everything in vain.

Feeling too truly, deeply and madly for an Angel,
For a mermaid;
Ooh…! She’s an unforgettable girl,
Just like the girl of my dreams;
Of so many sleepless nights,
Like A Girl from my next door.
Her fragrant smile gently expresses,
Million words carrying infinite thoughts.
Sometimes, notoriously like an innocent prankster,
Times, mystically like a jovial Philanthropist.
And some gets conveyed across a casual lip-twist,
Just like between friends to read;
Just between us,
Between Me and Her;
To discover and decipher.

Her big bold and beautiful eyes,
Carelessly whispers;
A magical spell upon me.
Hypnotizes and narrates,
An eternal love story for seven lives,
May be hers,
May be mine;
Or fortunately, may be ours.

Her curly locks makes me sway,
To and fro along with them.
And someday unconsciously has brushed my face,
For two and a half times;
And that’s when she unknowingly blushed,
And I fell in love with her.
Ooh…! She’s an unforgettable girl,
Just like the girl of my dreams;
Of so many sleepless nights,
Like A Girl from my next door.

 

Chapter – 2:

But every day, he had to drink early morning sips from the bitter truth, helplessly he was getting diminished from her memory lane.

She is no more even turning Green on Facebook.

Her Whatsapp profile pic has also disappeared from his phone; may be she has blocked him in Whatsapp.

She does no more like the poems posted by the lover Poet, maybe she is not even checking the poems, ‘Who knows?’ This is what nervous and failure Jordan would dejectedly say to himself, every time he logs into Facebook and checks his page.

‘Maya will never be mine, why she will ever get interested in me? When my monthly take home is also less than what she withdraws every month, as her salary. Moreover, she is successfully working in the domain she is interested into. She is living her life the way she wants, working to achieve her dreams. And I am so aimless and sleeplessly working in a BPO, writing some nonsense poems and dreaming to publish an Anthology on poems someday. Biased to become famous someday, as a writer/author and making loads of money and finally proposing Maya to marry him.’

“A Poem…”

With the minimal vocabulary in me,
I try to pen down my feelings;
Weighing each word against,
That particular thought to write;
What I feel,
The World I live in.
My merry and my mellows,
My schizophrenic fear and paranoia terrors;
Every tear I shed,
Whilst I get withdrawals;
Each smile that I crack;
When I conquer on my demons,
About every emotions of mine.

And, I give a damn if it makes any sense,
If it is all nonsense to you.
That is the freedom of a so called ‘Poet’,
The power in his weapon;
The liberty to pour undivided weightless thoughts,
Through an eternal black ink.
To submerge and lose the shameless mind,
In infinite and endless ocean of words.

Like an eccentric,
I would arrange the words;
Quiet often randomly misplaced,
And seldom in order.
For people like me jot because,
Our nervousness stammers verbally;
And we are just comfortable communicating,
Through paper bits and bytes.

Because, I have known me weird,
I have shown me to be strange.
My tears soaked and blotted as ink,
Might get torn and condemned,
Might lose its life in the dust bins today;
And would decay tomorrow.
But my soul would sing all these hymns,
An afterlife I dream of;
So, willingly with all points of authority,
I puke out everything through my Pen.
And that is when my so called ‘A Poem’ occurs,
Occurs in itself.

And I wish to write,
Scribble like this all my life…
Let the pages of my Diary,
Get blown in the winds of change.
But I will keep on composing,
Write my so called poems.
For my soul would sing all these hymns,
An afterlife I dream of;
So, willingly with all points of authority,
I puke out everything through my Pen.
And that is when my so called ‘A Poem’ occurs,
Occurs in itself.

                                                                                                                            Chapter – 3:

Times when Jordan and Maya used to work together in Accenture; they had lots of fun. They used to sit beside each other. Cubicle # 13 belonged to Jordan and she used to sit on cubicle # 12. Both joined the company in the same month and for his good luck, Maya and Jordon got trained together. In a short period of time both were ready to hit the production floor.

Days have become months and now have become years, they became good and compatible friends. Both of them getting along well was effortlessly inevitable, as both were Sagittarian. Jordan was born on 10th of Dec and Maya was born on 15th of Dec.

Slowly they started to know each other, Jordan was born in extremely distant eastern province of India and Maya was born and raised up in Bangalore, but her mother tongue was Marathi. They started to share about their childhood and the way they were raised by their parents. Jordan always used to make Maya wonder on how much pampered and spoiled kid he has been, which she used to always point out with care and concern for Jordan’s mistake and immature behavior.

And the below write up is what Jordan wrote that night for Maya. Jordan was so madly in love with Maya that he never realized that later on he would be writing a book about his love for her.

“That never so old secret of Yours.”

Like the dark blue sky, which silently waits
For distantly unknown stars to glitter and shine;
After the mighty Sun has gone to bed tonight,
Just like every night.
Like any beautiful peacock,
Which dances and waits in the verdant forests,
In a sweet anticipation of;
The first drop of rain and wonders,
If she is fallen in love again.

Ooh Girl…!!!
I’m in love with you again,
And this time;
I don’ wanna’ hold back myself,
And a friendly request to you;
Pretty girl, even you do not hold back yourself.
Ooh! Come closer…more closer,
And whisper that never so old secret of yours.

Like the cuckoo sweetly coos,
And wakes up the World;
Before every new dawn breaks open it eyes,
Like any natural morning alarm.
And there is a Mother, who sleeplessly waits;
For her never so lost son to come back,
Come back home.
As I can see a glimpse of her,
So effortlessly in you.

Ooh Girl…!!!
I’m in love with you again,
And this time;
I won’t hold back myself,
And a lover is pleading it to you;
Pretty girl, even you don’t hold back yourself.
Ooh! Come closer…and more closer,
And whisper that never so old secret of yours.

“Revelation: Halfway”.

And Partially the curtain was,
Raised for me tonight.
As she silently whispered into my ears;
That never so old secret of hers.
Subtly very sweetly turning towards me,
Cracking that gentle blushing smile of hers;
Casting on her petal like tender lips.
Somewhat hidden and halfway revealing;
The palpitations of her heart.
When mine were fully exposed,
Vulnerably naked and already bare;
In front of her and everyone.

Since long back, ever and since;
May be right from the first sight;
When I saw her from the corner of my eyes,
Found too deeply lost in her own thoughts;
Whilst, her eyes were unconsciously,
Constant were gazing at mine.

Ooh…! She’s like one mysterious girl,
Unpredictable, unique and seemingly unquenchable.
Like the early morning dew drops,
She oft get goose bumps so seductively;
On her chocolate smelling skin,
Which mesmerizes and hypnotizes me.
She unfolds her latent innocent beauty,
In sudden knacks;
In fraction of seconds.
Unlocking it in her every pleasant smile,
Through all weird expressions on her face.
In each out of box question,
She wonderingly and aimlessly asks;
After calling my name,
For thousand and one times.

 

Chapter – 4:

Maya was always active in the office, but always had mood swings. Sometimes, she would endlessly chat and chirp  as fickle as a bird and at times  she would just be silent  lost and drowned in her system. Of course, she never enjoyed the BPO  job so much that she would get lost and busy in the work. Rather, she would be typing a short story on the word pad.

Doubtlessly, on this note nevertheless, both were scribbling souls and not only the writing habit, there were many habits and common interests and  liking in both of them. Jordan would wonder about spending his life with Maya as both understood each othet well . Gradually, they started intuitively reading each others mind as well.

Maya had a habit of humming songs sitting in front of her system and simultaneously do her work of drafting emails to the clients. Maya knew that Jordan used to play the Guitar  and was a tolerable singer as well. She would sing and would laughingly say, ‘I know, I am not good at all.’  When it comes to reading each others mind, Jordan used to also reciprocate by singing few of his selected songs and slowly they started to talk or literally have a conversation based on the songs they would sing next. It was like a song of his would be a reply to her song. Jordan knew it very well that Maya would harmlessly flirt with her colleagues in office, so he did not hesitate to sing songs with her.

“Angles of Uncertainty”

A lunatic mind is so pessimistic,
And my heart has always been a pacifist;
To console my dejected Martian ego,
Every time I have lost;
And still shamelessly I lose,
With a strange will inside me not to choose;
Winning as an alternative option.
As I have become used to it now,
Since years and ages;
Since so long,
Mourning like those;
Long faced and white beard sages

And this time,
I am stuck in a Hurricane;
With and eye opening inside,
Inside my calm and foolish heart;
Now my being is at stake,
In extreme angles of uncertainty.
As my soul stirringly twists and turns,
In this so called Whirlpool of life.
Near the foothills of Mt. LOVE…

As you … Ooh!!! Girl,
You are like an unresolved riddle to me.
Clutching my muted spirits,
In close ended dilemmas;
Between a Yes and two No’s.
In this gamble of love,
Every time our eyes have met;
You left me so clueless about us,
About you and me being together.
You have left my in-numerous queries,
Virgin, untouched and unanswered;
Ooh…! Girl tell me about us,
Tell me about You and Me being together.

 

Chapter – 5

“Smells like Something is burning.”

After a long time,
Today I wonderingly;
Smelt like something was burning,
Really burns inside me.

Few stones got burnt,
And melted to leave me marooned;
And isolated in a dilemma;
Lonely to get lost somewhere,
Nowhere, but right in front of you.
Like an innocently fooled,
And ignorantly cheated child,
Who so possessively craves for;
His beloved favorite toy,
And his heart got broken;
With agony, anger, hurt and pain.
When that toy fascinates someone else,
But not him;
Never actually him…!!!

Ooh..! May be the blue heaven knows,
Or may be the mother Earth;
That what more life wants,
From that little boy in me…?
When I try to re-live decently and sober.
What more she asks from me…?
How much more love she desires,
And demands from me…?
All I asked her is to wait,
Just simply be patient;

For I need her help.
To run in the two legged race against time,
Holding her hands;
And clutching each moment to be Mine.
But one heart got cracked,
Was broken on the way,
Has got drenched and got washed away in jealous tears;
As an internal rage burns and hurts,
When that someone so special girl,
Fascinates someone else.
But not me,
Never really ME…!!!
Never ever ME…!!!

Nowadays, Jordan repents and regrets on the past. He strongly feels that he was mistaken and concluded wrongly. Maya’s love, care and extra concern for him was not out of her love or any kind of feelings for him, but it was just a simple friendship between them. Moreover, talking through by singing songs to each other was just a plain and simple prank between colleagues, a harmless flirting is quiet common in the BPO’s.

“First Slap by the Winds of Your Absence”.

Today, suddenly I was face to face with,
The bitter most, heart wrecking truth;
In grey old roads of life.
As our ways have diverged apart,
May be permanently;
Or may be just for now,

Ooh ! Girl…Cause who knows when,
Whom one meets then;
For the first time or once again,
For how many times;
Who knows when…???
One would meet again,
In which cross-road;
After which turn.
Then, when no one knows…???
After all who knows then…???

Today I was so strongly slapped,
And blown aback;
By the cold winds of your absence,
Shivering in my monotonous loneliness.
When My-self silently calls Your name,
And it resonantly echoes in vacant spaces;
To boomerang back,
Just unheard and unanswered;
Striking against the innermost corners of my heart.

Ssshhh…! And hiding from everyone,
Ooh ! Once again…
A drop of crimson love bled;
From my arid heart.
And like always in vain,
A drop of tear was shed;
From these pale and dry,
But lucid eyes.

Ooh ! Girl…Cause who knows when…???
Whom one meets when;
For the first time or once again,
For how many times;
Who knows when…???
In which cross-road,
After which turn;
Who knows when…???
After all…Who knows…???

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